


she has green eyes (and just a bunch of trouble, mother said).

by cruciao



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Femslash, Hogwarts, Hogwarts Era, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:22:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27951503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cruciao/pseuds/cruciao
Summary: So maybe Narcissa had expected for Severus’ friend to also be a boy.
Relationships: Narcissa Black Malfoy & Lily Evans Potter, Narcissa Black Malfoy/Lily Evans Potter
Kudos: 37





	she has green eyes (and just a bunch of trouble, mother said).

The first time Narcissa Black saw Lily Evans was on the spring of her fifth year in Hogwarts.

Severus had mentioned that he had a friend in Gryffindor, though Narcissa had never once seen him with anyone for her to actually believe him. He wasn’t really close to anyone in his house too, so her doubt was somehow justified. She wasn’t even sure Severus considered Narcissa as a friend. It didn’t matter, though, as long as they were still talking. Narcissa was, after all, the obedient kid of the Black family, and it only meant that she always obeyed her mother’s advice about broadening her relations. _Just the ones who matter, dear. We just want connections and not troubles, don’t we now?_

So maybe Narcissa had expected for Severus’ friend to also be a _boy_. Not a girl with auburn hair and the greenest eyes she had ever seen. When she saw Lily for the first time, walking side by side with Severus near the Great Lake, Narcissa had stopped and stood there in her place from behind one of the trees, unmoving. She observed the two of them silently, and if she didn’t know any better, Narcissa would say that she was _mesmerized._ Lily was laughing at something Severus said, her auburn hair billowed around her from the sweet spring breeze, framing her face like a fire surrounding a painting.

Narcissa felt like burning.

After that, it almost felt like she saw Lily everywhere that year. Lily, laughing with her Gryffindor friends. Lily, reading advance potion books in the library. Lily, eating her dinner diligently, though Narcissa also noticed all the untouched beans. Lily, whose last name she did not recognize from the list of Sacred Twenty Eight. Lily, whose last name belonged to two muggles from Cokeworth.

Lily.

Lily.

_Just the ones who matter, dear._

Her mother’s words rang hollow in her ears.

***

Lily Evans smiled once at Narcissa in the library, on the fall of her sixth year in Hogwarts. They were walking down the same section of the library only to end up skimming the same shelf to search for their own books.

“Oh hello, you must be Narcissa. Severus’ friend, isn’t it?” her tone wasn’t overly friendly, but it wasn’t an unpleasant possessive sort she sometimes got from one of Lucius’ girl friends. Lily had a smile on her face, and Narcissa had to remind herself to breathe. Mother said to never stumble on your own words.

“Yes. Lily, isn’t it? From Gryffindor,” she said the last word in subtle disdain, remembering the tone from her mother. Narcissa raised her head high, nose crinkled haughtily as she stared down to the younger girl —another thing she’s learned from her mother when speaking to or _about_ muggles.

Lily didn’t seem to notice all of it as she’s continued to search for her book, not catching any of Narcissa’s carefully arranged expression. Narcissa turned her head back to face the shelf, heat creeping up her own cheek.

It didn’t take long before she stole a few glances at Lily’s rosy cheeks or plump lips from the corner of her eyes, though. 

After a few more minutes of silence, Lily pulled a volume out of the shelf. She turned to face Narcissa once again, her infuriatingly bright smile still on her face. She put the book on her bag and shook a hand in an awkward sort of wave. Narcissa resisted from facing the younger girl once again, forcing her eyes to keep its focus on the books in front of her.

“So I guess— it’s nice to meet you, Narcissa. We should talk again sometimes.”

And then she was gone again, leaving a flurry of daisy scented perfume behind.

Narcissa loved daisies.

Narcissa sometimes thought it was a pity that she’d been born as the youngest of the Black family. No one had expected her to be strong, or powerful, or brave —no. Everyone had expected her to be demure, to be dainty, to be obedient. To get married straight out of school and mother a child in two or three years later —the _coincidental_ playdates with Lucius Malfoy her mother set up weren’t exactly telling anything otherwise. To put it simply, she was playing princess her whole life while her two sisters were warriors in the making. So she put on her most Narcissa way of complimenting as she sat down beside Lucius in their common room’s sofa.

“I can see the appeal, you know,” she started as she continued writing down her potion assignment. Lucius only frowned slightly.

“I mean Lily Evans— the uh, Severus’ friend,” she continued.

“She’s… quite easy to look at. For a _muggleborn._ ”

Narcissa pretended to be oblivious of Lucius Malfoy’s patronising stare on her direction.

If Narcissa was anything like her sister, Bella, she wouldn’t have gone the roundabout way about her compliment. _Bella_ would’ve just take an appreciative glance every now and then in the direction of anyone she’s interested in, and they would _know._ Her other sister, Andy, would’ve been a little bit subtle, though she would probably still say some bold remarks every now and then. _You got impeccable taste there, Severus,_ Narcissa could practically hear it in Andy’s voice.

But she was not any of them, and her mother would’ve frown at her if she dared to behave like that. No, no, Narcissa aimed to please the matriarch of the Black’s family. Beside, Narcissa thought to herself, her mother would’ve frowned anyway if she heard of Narcissa complimenting anyone with a whiff of muggle blood in them.

Her mother was not here to hear her words just now, though. Her mother was _also_ not here when she slipped a hand under her knickers on some nights that she couldn’t sleep, thinking of Lily Evans’ auburn hair and green eyes and daisy perfume.

***

When Narcissa entered her last year in Hogwarts, there was a trend in her house to call muggleborn as _mudbloods._ She didn’t join in on it, partly because the word sounded too crude still on her tongue, but she’s watched her friends all use it. Even Bella, and she’s graduated for awhile. Even her mother, so Narcissa understood that it wasn’t a crude remark —it was an appropriate one for those who just don’t _belong._

She also watched Andromeda getting burned from the family tree that summer, having decided to ran away from home with a mug— _mudblood_ in tow.

Narcissa sometimes wondered if Lily Evans liked running.

Lily has had a row with Severus for a few days now, Narcissa noticed, as she never saw the two of them together anymore. Severus was close with Avery now, and she knew that Lucius was also part of that circle —the Slytherin loyalties go way beyond graduation.

Narcissa toyed with the serpent pendant of her necklace. It was a gift from Lucius, a reminder, he said. She thought it was sweet and utterly mannered of him to do that. So she wore it everyday. Lucius was a nice guy, and nice guys get to have what they _want._ Narcissa also wasn’t exactly unaware of her mother’s silent will over her —to marry Lucius right after her NEWTS exam scores were out. No woman escaped marriage in her family, not even Bella, who was now with someone called Rodolphus Lestrange. Narcissa wasn’t sure if they would make a good match, but she wasn’t one to pry on Bella’s feeling.

Narcissa actually met Lily once again in the Great Hall that year. It was nearing Christmas time, so Lily wore a red scarf with little green embroidery scattered on top of it. She supposed the scarf bear more possibilities ( _colors,_ her mind corrected quickly, _colors_ ) to it than anything she’s owned her whole life. Their eyes met for a brief second, but Lily quickly turned her head around, something like surprise on her expression —but not the pleasant one. Lily was gone once again before she could blink her eyes, only that Narcissa was too far to actually smell her daisy perfume. Narcissa could only sit down for hours after that, starring at the place Lily had vacated as she worried her lower lip.

Narcissa thought Lily’s eyes would match better with Slytherin’s green. It shone in a way no jewellery could ever be, not even the ones in the deepest vault of her family. It was warm, and yet it was deep —like one could get lost in its color and never want to seek for the surface ever again.

Narcissa had mastered the art of color coordination by the age of eleven.

***

When years, years, years later Narcissa Malfoy (no _longer Black, no)_ met Harry Potter —having been captured and taken to the Manor— she could only see the splitting image of James Potter in him. A twinge of jealousy —and was that disappointment?— passed by in the quick second that she remembered of Lily.

It was only later on, much later on, when he’s shooting spells at her and she’s fighting back with her best spells, that she noticed his eyes. They were green. _Like Lily._ Nobody had told her that before. Not Severus. The papers with Potter’s articles were always burned immediately in the manor. She never knew —until now, that is.

Narcissa’s retaliation spell came almost a minute late. Potter’s ( _green,_ green) eyes bore surprise in them.

***

Narcissa only watched as Potter and his cronies apparated away from the manor.

***

Narcissa’s urgent whisper sounded like it didn’t belong to herself as she asked Potter —lying on the ground with his eyes shut— about Draco’s whereabout.

***

Narcissa’s expression as she stared straight into The Dark Lord’s eyes betrayed nothing of her emotion.

“Dead.”

_He had his mother’s eyes._

**Author's Note:**

> so what if Narcissa's reason for not turning Harry in was more than just familial love? aha. also i am not quite sure about the age difference about the two women, so please pardon me if it doesn't really make sense.


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